marți, 23 octombrie 2007

When nice feelings are gone and divorce becomes a must


Divorce is the legal breakup of a marriage. Almost half of all U.S. marriages end in divorce. Like every major life change, divorce is stressful. It affects finances, living arrangements, household jobs, schedules and more. If the family includes children, they may be deeply affected.
Every year, more than one million children in the United States experience the divorce of their parents. The average divorce takes place within the first seven years of marriage, so many of these children are under the age of 6. For many children, divorce can be as difficult as the death of a parent. The entire family is faced with the challenge of adjusting to a new way of life. When this happens, children need the guidance, patience, and love of both parents to help them through.
The most important factor in how divorce affects a child's life is how parents treat each other and their children during and after the divorce. Keep in mind, divorce is a major event in your child's life, one that she has no control over. Parents must work together to make the changes as easy as possible for everyone. Even as the marriage ends, your role as a parent continues. In fact, it becomes more important than ever. Set aside your differences with your child's other parent and put your child first.
Never force your child to take sides. Every child will have loyalties to both parents.
Do not involve your child in arguments between the two of you.
Do not criticize each other in front of your child or when your child might be listening to a conversation you are having with someone else. Even if you find out the other parent is saying bad things about you, explain to your child that when people get angry they sometimes say things that are hurtful.
Discuss your concerns and feelings with your child's other parent when and where your child cannot hear.
Avoid fighting in front of your child.

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